Its not even lunchtime and this day has turned into all sorts of fucked. From every bloody position. And all I can do is watch, gagged. And let me not even begin to mention how fucked this week has been. And I just need this rant.
Why can’t things be easier to understand or execute. I mean really. why is this anal retentiveness a favorite past time of the universe whenever I open my eyes. It’s not enough that personally and financially, whoring myself is the only way the situation gets better but my pot of savings, that lovely apple pie that I was hoping would be mine to eat now seems to be in a ‘who is its owner’ phase.
Why was I so stupid as to take up a financial plan which I didn’t understand. Because I am an idiot who believed a sales guy at the HDFC office!! He explained it simply. He told me it’s no fuss. He told me I won’t have to use my brain in this one. Why in the world did I believe him and now I am stuck in a mess that smells of all sort of shit specially mixed together for me.
And to top it all, my mother believes I will be upto no good with all the money in my hand and that she must get upset with me about it. Aargh, someone needs to let up. give me a break. I am not an idiot, although proven otherwise by said bank already, I am 28 whatever and I can take a few if not all decisions myself.
But forget that, you then think fine, this is a bad week, things are pretty shite, let me confide in my sister. She will patiently listen and UNDERSTAND what is happening. No shit Sherlock, she doesn’t. infact, she goes ahead and just tells you how YOU being a smartass is a problem. Whatever happened to old fashioned ‘I am listening to you and its ok’ kind of platitudes.
I just want platitudes now. I am done with the world thinking its allrite to tell me I am being stupid. I feel everyday that I probably am not good enough to do certain things, but I am made to realize this even more by the same people I go to as well. Why will I then come to you, if all you will tell me is that it is my fault. I know I know sometimes I need to hear that its my fault. But this is not that time.
Fine. Rant over. Problem still not. Thanks for listening. Leave advice or ‘I told you so’ in the comments section. or better still, leave me alone.